(cue MG-HSH theme)

The Ghost of Jay Stewart:
It's time for the...

...with our guests..

...from the world
of chemistry...
ROBB BAUM

 

...from Net Price is Right...
JAY LEWIS

 

...from Gold Rush...
CHRIS CLARK

 

...stockbroker supreme ...
ANDY GELLER

 

...from Net Slingo...
PAUL CRABBE

 

...and the stars of
The Net Match Game -
Hollywood Squares Hour ...
RYAN MORRIS AND
DOUG MORRIS

(NMG-HSH sign rises; MG-esque doors open, Ryan and Doug are welcomed 
to an ecstatic crowd; walk down the stairs; shake hands)


Doug: Thank you, ghost of Jay Stewart.  Hellloooooo everybody, and
welcome to another star-studded, big money episode of the Net Match 
Game - Hollywood Squares Hour.  (points to Ryan) He's Ryan.

Ryan: (points to Doug) He's Doug.

Ryan and Doug in unison: And we ain't related.  (audience laughs)

Ryan:  Let's welcome our panel.  Hello, stars.

Panel in quasi-unison: Hello, Ryan and Doug.

Doug: Hey, we crowned a new champion on the last show.

Ryan: That's right, Phil Levine will be attempting to add to his 
winning of CY$6600.  He or perhaps one of our Match Game players
could go on to a special episode Doug thought of.

Doug: Indeed.  At least two players in NMG-HSH's history have won at 
least CY$30,000 -- Greg Diener and Eddie Timanus.  As soon as we get
one more to reach that 30-grand threshold, those three players will
participate in our special tournament of champions episode.

Ryan: The overall winner could collect well over CY$100,000.

(audience cheers)

Doug: Indeed.  We've got two so far and we'll tell ya more as soon
as we get that third winner of CY$30,000.  And it doesn't have to
be done in one fell swoop with the head-to-head match.  A champ could
win, say, CY$2500 from the secret square jackpot, CY$7500 from one
head-to-head match and CY$20,000 from another endgame.  That's 30-grand
right there and qualification for the tournament.

Ryan: And as we said, we'll release more details as soon as our
tournament field is complete and the champions can join us.  

Doug: But right now, Ryan, let's start the fun with Match Game as
you join our stars.  (Ryan heads for the Morris chair on the bottom
row of the panel; Doug walks over to the MG players' desks)  Right
now, let's welcome our challengers, Tim McClelland and Shawn Wells.

 

 

(audience cheers)

Doug: Welcome fellas.  Tim, let's get your life's story.

Tim: Well, Doug, my name is Tim McClelland.  I am 27 years old;
 originally from Jacksonville, TX, now residing in Springfield, MO.  
I am a poultry processor, which means I take poultry and process them 
into filets, cold cuts, etc, and we ship them across the USA and in
18 different countries in the world.  

Doug: Man, I'm getting hungry already.  (audience laughs)  Anything
else you'd like to tell us?

Tim: My interests include surfing the internet, music, watching sports
on TV, and I am a die-hard fan of the World Wrestling Federation.

(audience cheers)

Doug: Sounds like we have a few WWF fans in the house, too.  Welcome
Tim.  Shawn, a few words about you.

Shawn: Hi. I'm Shawn Wells.  I am from Russellville, KY.  I enjoy 
bowling, and carry a 200 average.  I hope to go pro in a couple of 
years.  I just found out today that my wife is going to have our first 
child.  
(audience cheers)

Doug: Well, congratulations.  Good luck with the new addition and good
luck to *both* of you in our game.  We're playing Match Game the PM
way....  

 

 

 

Doug: That means you each get three tries to match as many of these
nice citizens as you can.  Each time you match a star, you collect
CY$100.  In the event you match all six, we augment your score to
CY$1000.  High score after three rounds wins the game and the right
to play our champ Phil in Hollywood Squares.  The winner there plays
our Super Match for a possible payoff of CY$30,000! (audience cheers)
(Doug pushes the button revealing the first round questions)

MG ROUND 1 BEGINS